What Exactly Does Balance Life Mean For You?
April 23, 2008
This is an important point. Balance means something different for each and every one of us, and to find out what it means to you is the first step to achieving it. For some people it means no stress at all, having everything in perfect order, living a perfectly healthy life, feeling energised, calm and in control. For others it is cutting back the workday from 18 hours to 14 hours, the number of coffees from ten to five . . . You get the picture.
How do we know if our lives are out of balance?
This is a great question and one that we would all answer a little differently. Among the business owners I encounter, the most common response is an overwhelming feeling that they are no longer in control of their life or their business. They are being pulled in a hundred different directions, to the point where they just don’t know how to break the cycle.
This feeling of being overwhelmed is probably the best indicator we have of being out of balance. We can feel overwhelmed by negative thoughts, negative people, circumstances and the long list of responsibilities we feel we should be meeting. Frustration, stress and often conflict outweigh the emotions of joy, peace, happiness and fulfilment. We have got so caught up in hectic daily activities, running on automatic, that at some point we have begun to question what it is all for. What am I doing with my life? What about me?
Being out of balance is a largely modern-day ailment that, if left undiagnosed and untreated, manifests as some of the more common health issues that seem to be occurring in plague proportions today.
The top ten reasons for losing the battle of balance
The following list identifies the ten most common reasons for getting out of balance. While there are many more, these are the biggest culprits:
1. Overwork-simply putting in too many hours and being a slave to the business.
2. Financial problems-struggling to make ends meet in the business and worrying about how you will pay your bills.
3. Overcommitment-agreeing to do too much for too many people and not leaving enough time or energy for yourself.
4. Poor stress management-not knowing how to manage your own stress or not being able to admit that it is a problem.
5. Relationship issues-with partners, family and friends, co-workers and customers.
6. Poor lifestyle-eating badly, lack of exercise, and alcohol and drug abuse.
7. Lack of direction-feeling trapped and isolated in the business and uncertain about your future direction.
8. Lack of boundaries-being too accessible to too many people.
9. No space to rejuvenate-no holidays, time out, hobbies or distractions to remind you why you do what you do.
10. Having a negative environment or negative people around you every day.
Why do we get it so wrong?
Ironically, we get out of balance by trying to do what we think is right. We work hard, we commit completely to our businesses, we argue that to succeed we need to be devoted to growing the business, especially in the early stages, and, most significantly, we are energised and excited about the future.
Over time we get busier, our responsibilities grow and our needs and expectations are overtaken by the needs and expectations that others have of us. Then the feeling of being overwhelmed starts to move in.
The better you are at what you do, the more likely you are to start feeling overwhelmed-because more people want what it is you are selling. As your business grows there are more staff, more customers, more suppliers, bigger sums of money to manage and generally more paperwork to contend with. So in some ways, feeling out of balance with your business and your life is a reflection of the fact that you are great at what you do-take it as a compliment.
But before you get too carried away with patting yourself on the back and being proud that your life is completely out of control, remember that as your business has grown, you have had to learn a host of new skills to deal with this growth. Learning how to have a business and a life is just another set of skills that need to be learned along the way.
There are two ways to deal with being out of balance. The first is to change yourself and your perceptions. The second is to change your circumstances. Most likely both will be necessary. However you look at it, there must be a constant and ongoing commitment to do what is best for you, and the courage to create the necessary changes, so that you are honouring yourself, the people in your life, and the planet.
[tags]Balance Life, out of balance, stress management[/tags]
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