#18 Identify The People Who Cause You Problems And Do Something About Them
May 16, 2008
Just as we develop negative thought patterns that are reinforced by negative language, there are often people in our lives who further reinforce these beliefs and literally bring us down by what they say and do.
We all have friends who make us wince when they walk in. We know that within five minutes they will have us completely depressed, and feeling that there is nothing we can do about it. Their lives are desperate, sad, tragic, bored or whatever, and odds on you have a sympathetic ear, so you listen and they keep coming back to tell you more.
#17 Gossiping, Moaning And Complaining—End It Today!
May 15, 2008
When you are feeling overwhelmed, out of control, depressed or negative, your conversation tends to be less than positive. This is when gossiping, moaning and complaining slip into the conversation. Unfortunately, after a while they become the norm.
I have a client I meet with once a week. He spends the first half-hour of our meeting moaning and complaining about the company he works for. It is tragic and sad and, to be honest, very depressing. My advice to him is always the same-leave. Find a company where you will be happy; life is far too short for ongoing misery.
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#16 Avoid Getting Caught On Steamship Misery
May 14, 2008
I talk to a lot of small business owners around the world. Interestingly, no matter which country I’m in, there seems to be a common misconception that small business is supposed to be tough, otherwise you aren’t doing it right. I call this ‘Small Business Syndrome’, and I believe it really holds small business owners back.
Small Business Syndrome relates to all the negatives of having a small business-and yes, there are a number of them, but in my opinion the positives far outweigh the negatives. And let’s be honest: if they didn’t, why on earth would you ever start your own business?
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#15 What Words Describe Your Life Now And In The Future?
May 13, 2008
Make a list of the words that describe your life now and how you would like it to be in the future. This tip follows on from the last, but it is a little more specific about how you can change the way you think. In my experience, the people who are positive and energetic about their life and their business are always much happier and more balanced. If you listen closely to what they say you will see that their words reflect their thoughts-and that is the key.
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#14 Make A List Of The Negative Words You Use And Burn It
May 12, 2008
I got into a nasty habit a while back. Whenever friends, colleagues or associates asked how I was, my standard response would be something along the lines of: ‘I’m so busy I can’t do any more. It’s ridiculous-I’m working really long hours, I’m not sure if I’m getting anywhere, and I’m certainly not looking for any more clients.’ This response was a reaction to being very busy for a number of years.
Then things started to happen that made me realise I was heading down a dangerous road. One day I actually listened to what I was saying when a friend asked me how things were going; to my shock I realised I’d responded with my standard tirade without even stopping to think how things really were going. My friend’s eyes glazed over, my mouth was on automatic pilot. As this weird, negative little action went on, I realised I was reinforcing my negative beliefs.
#13 What Are The Limiting Beliefs That Keep Your Life Out Of Control?
May 11, 2008
Limiting beliefs are very interesting. Most of us have inherited them from our parents or other influential people in our lives, or even from the media. These can be beliefs that stop us from excelling in life.
I saw an extreme example of a limiting belief on a trip to Sri Lanka recently. In an elephant orphanage, the elephants seemed to be held in their places by a length of string tied around one back leg. Clearly the elephants could have broken away in a second but apparently they never did. The reason for this was explained by one of the handlers.
What I Need To Do To Regain Balance In My Life
May 10, 2008
The words that come out of your mouth are as important as those you hear
In this section I address the negative thoughts that we hold as true, often without even realising it, and how they are reinforced by and manifested in what we say and do.
Often we think of balance and harmony as being about sitting on a mountain and chanting. Sure, that would be great, but a lot of the time we don’t have a mountain handy and we need something a little more convenient. Closer to earth, simply changing what we say and how we say it can have an incredible impact on our sense of wellbeing.
#12 Be Prepared To Invest In The Process
May 9, 2008
To get back the balance that is missing in your life you will have to invest. This investment will be in the form of time, energy and money.
Part of your investment in time will be taken up when you sit and plan what you want your life to be like. Another part will be used to go to seminars, read websites, talk to other like-minded people, to get fit, to learn better techniques for managing people, and for reflection. Time is our most precious commodity and the one most of us complain we don’t have enough of. Of course, the old cliché is that we all have the same amount of time available (and I don’t really need to talk about the likes of Bill Gates, Rupert Murdoch and Richard Branson all having the same amount of time as we do). Using your time to bring balance and harmony back into your life will reap great benefits for you and all those people close to you.
Your energy will be needed on a number of levels. You need energy to make the changes necessary to bring balance back to your life. You need energy to break out of the ‘comfort zone’ (the safety of the familiar) that tends to hold us in the state of being overwhelmed, and you need energy to keep going once you have made these breaks. The more successful you become in business the more opportunities and distractions come your way. Each one of them can play a role in throwing balance out the window. Energy is a powerful weapon in the harmony arsenal.
And last but by no means least is cash. You will have to invest in yourself in order to get fit, to reward yourself, to learn new skills and to change the way you do business. The amount you need to spend will depend entirely on you. If you are a self-starter and can get and stay fit on your own you probably won’t need a personal trainer, but if you are like me and need to have someone stalking you to get you moving, you will have to allocate money to this.
I find it quite strange that we are so focused on having money when we retire yet we devote very little time or money to maintaining our health and wellbeing in the meantime to ensure we get there! From where I sit I don’t want to ever retire, and I certainly don’t plan to. But I do want to be healthy and full of energy until the day I die. Investing in my health and wellbeing today is far more important to me than my retirement fund. You may disagree, but as always it’s up to the individual.
The moral to this tip is that to fuel the changes necessary to have a long, healthy and rewarding life in which business is a major component, it is very likely that you will have to be prepared to invest time, energy and money on a regular basis.
What can I do today?
How much time, energy and money are you prepared to invest in yourself to get your life the way you want it to be? Clearly this is not an easy question to answer, but it is a great question to ask. There is no right or wrong amount, but the important message is the realisation that you will need to invest in your Life Bank.
[tags]Balance Life, out of balance, Invest[/tags]
#11 What Are The Things You Have Always Wanted To Do?
May 8, 2008
Make a list of all the things you have always wanted to do but have never found enough time, money or energy for. I find this a very interesting exercise. It’s your ‘life wish list’, and what goes on it is entirely up to you. When we are feeling overwhelmed one of the biggest issues is that there doesn’t seem to be any way out, that often there isn’t a lot to look forward to except more of the same.
#10 Visit Your Doctor, Healer Or Naturopath
May 7, 2008
A big component in achieving balance between business and life is being healthy. Stress encourages poor health and most business owners are under a lot of stress.
I suggest that you visit your chosen medical advisor and get a thorough check-up. Use it as a baseline. Where is your body at today? Whether mainstream or alternative (and best start with the mainstream if you are aware of anything significant, and even if you aren’t), they will probably get you to have a number of tests, prod and poke you a bit, and give you advice that you don’t want to hear, but the information will help.
